Disappointments and Forgiveness

I have been disappointed again!!! Life is full of disappointments. Maybe I have too high of expectations of others. I expect people to treat others with respect - I expect people to think of others - I expect people to treat each other the way they would want to be treated. I was raised hearing the Golden Rule almost on a daily basis (it seemed like it anyway). "Do unto others the way you would want others to do unto you". I also tried to instill that in my children. I hope I didn't preach it at them on a daily basis though!

I am struggling with the decision of giving someone another chance or being a doormat!

I wonder if it could possibly be God's plan to have put someone in my life - and for this person to hurt someone I love very much - all for His glory. Does this make any sense? I don't want to mention names but I will call this person Suzy Q. I am feeling like I am suppose to talk to Suzy Q, who has made me very angry!!! I don't think I am to talk to her about my anger - but I think I am suppose to talk to her about my Jesus.

I have watched Suzy Q become part of my family - we all love her! She has been very respectful and helpful - a wonderful person. She has willingly participated in the spiritual part of our lives. And now - BAM!!! She has done something that cuts me and my family to the core!!! People are saying 'kick her to the curb' - 'you are just asking for more pain' - 'you can't trust her and you can't have a relationship with someone you can't trust'. But I somehow feel like God is saying, "Love her" - "Forgive her" - "Talk to her" - "Don't put your faith in her, put your faith in me" - "Tell her I love her and what I have done for her" - "Plant a seed".

So I think 'okay, I want to be obedient - maybe God is getting ready to do something big here and I have an opportunity to be part of it, so, YES! I will talk to Suzy Q!'.

Then I start to think, 'I am trying to make this all about me - I just want to be part of something big for God so I can feel good about myself. Who do I think I am?'

What am I suppose to do here! Lord, please make it clear!!! So I am going back to what I have always heard about God's will - If it goes against His Word, don't do it. I think it is always God's will to share His love with others. Satan would NOT want me to do that - so he must be the one telling me to forget about it - Funny how he uses my pride issue to try and talk me out of sharing Jesus.


Lord, this life experience has reminded me that I am not to depend on others to fill me up. They will always disappoint me. Only You, Lord - the Living God - can fill me up. So fill me, Jesus, with you - Empty me of me and let me be a light for You in this dark world. I want to be obedient to You Lord. Allow me the opportunity to share You with Suzy Q and grant me the right words to say. Help me and my family to forgive her and to be an example of Your love. May you be glorified through this disappointment!

Happy Birthday Levi!

Yesterday was a fun day!! We celebrated Levi's birthday a little late. Levi, Kate, Jake, and I went to The Incredible Pizza Place in St. Louis. Cole joined us for a while. We ate pizza, pasta, salad, dessert, etc and then took on the big game room! Jake, Levi & Cole did their best to impress us with their strenth at some type of hammer swing game and also a punching bag. We had fun playing mini bowling, Wheel of Fortune pin ball, skee ball, dunk the alien, guitar hero, a Sega dinosaur hunting game (till Jake and Levi were told they had to share the game by an employee), bumper cars, and flaming fingers (this one was quite addicting!). We actually accumulated roughly 1200 tickets in our hour and a half! Then we had the tough decision of what we wanted to get with our tickets! Levi chose a BIG tennis ball and candy, Jake and Kate got hackie sacks, Kate got a spiny squishy pink ball and candy, and I got 2 large foam dice and a spiny squishy pink ball.

Next we headed to the mall. Everyone made at least one purchase and we enjoyed some cookies and a cherry icee!

Last stop was PetSmart. I needed to pick up some breath mints for Pixie girl. The kids had fun checking out the dogs for adoption. Levi kept threatening to try to smuggle one home, but he couldn't pull it off. That didn't scare me as much as when Jake threatened to smuggle a snake home! Yikes!!!

We made it home safe and sound with no new pets!!!

It was a great family day - I loved every minute of it - just wish Seth, Jessica, Colby and Carson could have been in on the fun!

Jesus Saves!

I received some very exciting news a week ago! My nephew, Jordan, accepted Jesus!!! He is a freshman at Southeast Mo University and had just moved down a few days before classes started. He walked into an open area (not sure where) but anyway there was 1 guy sitting at a table so Jordan went over and sat down and started talking with this guy. Turns out the guy is planning on being a pastor. This guy asked Jordan if he could share something with him and started talking with him about salvation. After several hours, Jordan asked Jesus into his heart! Jordan's words to me were: "I've never felt this good! I don't want to spend another day not living for Jesus!" He has been attending a Bible teaching church and is getting involved in the Campus Ministry! God is so awesome! I am so grateful that this one guy was obedient and bold enough for Christ to share his faith with Jordan!!

Lord, thank you for this young man who spoke out for you. He has made a difference in your kingdom and I ask your blessing on him. Father, I pray for Jordan - may his faith in you grow and may he fall deeply in love with You. I pray for the road that is ahead of him. Grant him the strength to face the temptations that Satan will place in his path. Help Jordan as he tries to be a witness to his family and friends - may they see the difference You have made in his life! Father, I pray that I could possess a bit of this boldness for You and I pray that others can see You in my life!

Jesus came to them and said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."